How we meet & why we meet matters: organise business meetings in your favour
I love engagement but getting diverse voices to be heard tactfully during contentious discussion about an important project or business idea between technical and non-technical people, or between irate community or business stakeholders, requires strategic thinking.
After reading ‘The Art of Gathering’ by Priya Parker, I’ve put in front and centre “how we meet and why we meet” matters! Parker provides plenty of bold approaches to organising gatherings (meetings or events of any kind), from large scale to intimate community and business gatherings, well known corporate bid failures and successes, to even an Arab and Israeli student summer camp.
When working with tight budgets and deadlines, sometimes we’re faced with organising important meetings in venues that don’t serve our purpose well. Nevertheless if you are facilitating or leading the discussion in anyway, you need to be familiar with the territory you are going to use to ensure that the venue layout will be to your advantage wherever possible to minimise risk.
I recall a time when I attended a meeting with my Manager and our GM that was run by a strategic partner about a highly contentious project. The strategic partner and our Department were already on two different sides of the political fence in the past, and by having 12 people seated completely opposite to us (in the longest boardroom table I have ever seen), suggested that they wanted to dominate the meeting and that they had the resources to do so.
I see this often when I’ve walked into inception meetings for major projects. The strategic partner comes in top heavy to demonstrate they are well resourced but include too many observers from all nooks and crannies of their business. All this makes the attendee feel wary to give away anything. Why you would need to be dealing with 12 resources from the ‘same’ division (in my example above, they all came from the Corporate Affairs team) and who’s paying for this? Only 2 people out of this meeting could actually provide value and the rest took 45 minutes of our time needlessly with their empty introductions. My GM declined to attend any future meetings with them.
If you want successful meeting outcomes especially project buy-in and collaboration, minimise risk by strategically arranging a meeting room setting and structure that works in your favour. It needs to suggest that power is equalised for both guests and hosts (even if in real life it is not). That collaboration is being encouraged, and people should feel safe and comfortable enough to offer different points of view that is being heard and acknowledged.
Here is my take on some of Parker’s ideas from my experiences working in major infrastructure projects with a tight budget in mind:
✅ Context of venue matters: use furniture to create circular or concave seating arrangements where you (and attendees) can view each other’s body language and responses equally – this creates the sense that this is a safe forum and power appears to be equalised for all (think of King Arthur’s knights round table).
✅ Neutral territory is best when dealing with a sticky problem e.g. a community room at a library or school, but make sure it is easily accessible for all. Paying for a virtual office room (most urban and CBD centres have them now), could also be an option. They’re not always expensive as you think and some are actually for free, visit your local council website for more information.
✅ If the meeting setting is large, and it’s a small group of people, use furniture to make the space feel more intimate, otherwise large unused space will make people feel overwhelmed and people will psychologically distance themselves or have their backs up.
✅ If people are going to be upset by a decision and it’s not ‘business as usual’ meeting, don’t have the meeting at a noisy construction site or kitchen area where you’re constantly interrupted by others getting their safety gear or lunch box. A quiet café may do the trick if last minute.
✅ Do your homework, know who needs to be there and who wants (or demands) to be there. What are the risks if they’re not there? Draw boundaries. Make clear WHY you are having the meeting in the first place (what problem are you trying to solve), and who MUST (or SHOULD) be there.
✅ People from your own team out of politeness may invite everyone such as ‘observers’ inside your business but observers can also unravel or dominate the meeting with their opinions.
To minimise upsetting ‘observers’ of any kind, and to prevent them from hijacking your meeting or dividing opinions that could hurt your project, I suggest the following where possible:
➡️ Have a quick briefing with ‘VIP observers’ beforehand to ensure you have them onside and ensure their brief or message is heard or understood. Obtain as much insights as you can (on some occasions you may have to include them), so make it clear that their presence could create further barriers to the conversations you need, and stakeholders may feel intimidated with their presence. So if they insist, position them literally on the outside of your circle of discussion and interject if they try to interrupt. Yes, I’ve had to interject VIPs from interrupting when necessary.
➡️ Other types of observers who wish to be there (but don’t need to be) can receive a personal phone call, or courtesy email with information or a promise to be updated post meeting.
➡️ You also need to ensure you have the right subject matter experts there or access as much of their insider insights or legacy knowledge. Otherwise key stakeholders will be upset if they have to repeat their stories or concerns again especially to a stranger.
➡️ Most importantly, have an experienced stakeholder engagement professional with you. They should really be introduced early to help you prepare for the meeting by mapping out key stakeholders and identifying potential risks for you and organising the right venue. They will also know how to smooth out any hot issues with stakeholders during your meeting.
Being prepared and strategic in the purpose and venue of your important gathering, will help you avoid having your important project or idea stalled or derailed by others.
Thank you to Leanne Hughes, who told me about this book. It took me a while to finally read it, but now that I’ve devoured it (twice), it is now my go to guide for inspiration and for best practice on how to reimagine intimate to large scale business meetings or events.
